Do you know why children are angry and how to cope with the little devil?15 October
Children are not always white and fluffy. They are not free from the aggressive emotions from the tender age. Sometimes the child grows too aggressive and your life gets very hardwith this little demon. Why do angels turn into devils? What is the reason of children’s angry?
Firstly, parents should remember that they should not to prohibit children from the expression of the negative emotions. Emotions are a necessary entity. They can’t be canceled, denied and removed. Even negative emotions are necessary for full development of the child.
The more parents will suppress negative emotions of the child, the more children will express the latent aggression and the unexpected flames of anger. In addition, the self-aggression may appear (aggression directed at himself), and various psychosomatic diseases where the suppressed aggression expressed by the body diseases.
So why do children get angry? Psychologists have pointed out the 3 main reasons:
1. The sense of anxiety and fear. There are various reasons of the child has a such feeling, and one of the main reason is theunfavorable atmosphere in the family. These children usually have unexpected and expressive flames of anger.
2. Fighting with interdictions. Building the own system of education it is impossible not to fence about the child with a solid wall of interdictions and limitations. Of course,the childdoesn’t like it. And if you put too many restrictions or you don’t motivate them, the childexpressesthe fighting through aggression. Also, don’t forget to reconsider and to adjustthe current system of interdictionsas children get older.
3. "This is my territory!" Sometimesaggressive children want to say exactly this. Their aggression is the way to stand for their independence. Parents don’t have to put the child at the absolute dependence of them and make the child to feel that he isno one without them. Quite the opposite way, for the child from the age of 3 years is very important to understand his importance in the world. Especially this aggression appears in times of the age crises: 1 year, 3 years and 7 years.
Well, how to cope with the child's aggression? In any case you should not to respondwith aggression to aggression. This is not the case when the minus to minus gives plus. Very often parents who show to the child a bad example of the anger with reason and without reason right along have the aggressive children.
Very often children appeal to physical aggression. Children can’t swear, so they prefer to fight:this is the natural outgo for their aggression. You can teach your little brawler to express his anger in words, but, of course, without any foul language. Lethim learn to say "Stop", "Enough", "Don’t do that!" to his offender instead of fighting him. Better if the child will learn to talk to you about his negative, that he was angry, upset or offended. Basically, his tempest of anger is a signal about such feelings which he tries to show you. Teach your child to speak right out about his emotions.
You can create a special "evil pillow" for splashes of negative emotions which the child can yell or beat it. You can also try the methods of art therapy inviting your child to draw his anger or sculpt it out of plasticine, and then destroy his creation, or it’s better to turn it into something positive.
In addition, when the child has strong attacks of anger, try to talk to the child calm, affectionate, hug him, hold him close, but in any case do not get angry yourself. It is better if youcalm him that way, and then findthe reason for such behavior in detailswith him, and decide how to find the way out of the difficult situation.